2015/ Suzette O'Flynn (Mommy)
Today is February 1st and I realize I have not posted since July 14, 2014...I do believe 2015 is going to be a STELLAR year - we have moved from Vancouver to Merritt since; supporting another family member who lost their son this fall, made it through another Christmas, learned my sister is on a new journey with her life - which I am very happy for her; enjoying the moments I get to spend with my parents and nieces and nephews; although not physically there, I got to witness the birth of my brother Sam's daughter Winter; my eldest neice, Virginia on the birth of her second child, Ivy Grae Johnson. The biggest and BESTEST news yet...Brandi Lee-Ann O'Flynn is also expecting - and due June 17 AND our surrogate daughter, Vanessa (NESSY) Foley is also expecting - she is due August 5...oh and we are in the process of buying a house...we are finally rooting somewhere - Merritt :) This year will be 10 years Kayla - and although we have so much to be thankful for, I still find myself unable to ponder on your pictures or memories for too long...still breaks my heart that you are gone and not physically here to share in all the joy; you loved family functions so you are so very missed when they take place. I am taking this moment to thank you Kayla for watching over Brandi and Baby - keep them safe as they rise each morning. I just felt a need to share as my heart needs to just release....I love and miss you my SweetGirl...until we meet again ♥ Close
July 14 2014 ~ 9 years ago today.... / Kevin &. Suzette O'Flynn (Daddy & Mommy )
9 years ago today we all gathered around your side - one by one we shared our good-byes. You were an amazing young woman Kay~Marie...amazing older sister, the bestest friend, a loving grand-daughter, a wonderful niece and cousin and of course our FOD (as my sister would put it). The gangs all here Kay~Marie...loving and missing you - wishing you were still here!!!
'Love is like the wind, you can't see it but you can feel it.'
Love you Kayla Marie Dawn O'Flynn ♥♥♥ Close
Childhood memories / Ashley Massey (Cousin)
I was sitting here today, and you popped into my head, and all the family memories we had together. Tattooing each other which you were one amazing artist, playing in the big feild where you guys lived in red bluff, picking all the raspberries and eating them when we were suppose to bring them back for auntie Sharon to make dessert with, or there was this one time I remember so clearly when your mom made is dinner, but all the veggies were from the garden and didn't get washed properly, so when we started eating we found slugs all over are plate!!!! Yuck, I don't think we ate much dinner that night, we ended up having chips and candy instead of fresh veggies out of the garden. <3 hope heaven is treating you we'll Kayla <3 you are forever a beautiful angel watching over us Close
2011 has come and gone....it was difficult sharing anything throughout the year as 2011 marked 6 years to the date. Again, a lot happened throughout the year ~ Brandi came and went on three different occasions this year...moved home December 2010, left again in January 2011, moved home in July 2011 and left again in September and again, Christmas and is in process of leaving yet again. I think I did pretty good this year, I came to a lot of conclusions with myself, my life and what happens around me; I am 47 years old now and I have decided it's time to start looking after me in order for me to be of any benefit to anybody else including my husband and daughter. Even though the light has come on in certain areas of my life, I still consider myself as just functioning....day in day out....nothing really exciting, no ambition to do anything and still trying to find happiness.
Society needs to realize that when a parent loses a child....that scar never heals...NEVER; we, as parents, are never the same. At the end of one of my favourite shows, this quote was recited:
It has been said, 'time heals all wounds.' I do not agree. The wounds remain. In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue and the pain lessens. But it is never gone. Rose Kennedy
This is so true with the exception of 'the pain lessens'; I believe the pain is always there, you just learn to live with it and you allow that pain to surface, it rips your insides apart....so many emotions to handle.
The best things in my life are my daughters....I am greatful to have know Kayla....and so very greatful to have Brandi in my life.....she, along with my husband, is my rock....she gives me the purpose to live.
May 2012 bring better things in my life, more energy and ambition and the strength to hold onto what I have left.
~Kayla Marie Dawn O’Flynn~ July 22, 1990 – July 14, 2005
Six years ago...
We lost a very special person… Our daughter the bestest sister a granddaughter the bestest friend an auntie, a neice and a cousin…
She was so very, very special And was so from the start You held her in your arms But mainly in your heart And like a single drop of rain That on still waters fall, Her life did ripples make And touched the lives of all. She's gone to play with angels In heaven up above So keep your special memories And treasure. them with love Although your darling daughter Was with you just a while She'll live on in your heart With a sweet remembered smile
We love and miss you SweetGirl…always and forever!!!
2011/ Suzette O'Flynn (Mommy)
Today's date is Sunday January 9 2011.....a lot happened in 2010; we made it through yet another Christmas and I ring in this New Year still trying to sort out how to make things better in this life. I know I can't bring you back.....I know I can't hold onto the past....so I guess the answer is continue to take that staircase just one step at a time as long as I am moving forward and to never forget you and all that you were! I will always think of you each and every day....I keep you alive in my heart my SweetGirl (that tear will always be there) I love and miss you dearly. Love mommy xoxoxo Close
Kayla Marie Dawn O'Flynn, Our SweetGirl / Suzette O'Flynn (Mommy)
I still see that one single tear falling down your cheek as you tried to call my name “Mommy”…it's hard to believe it’s been 5 years today…it breaks our hearts that you had to leave us...We love and miss you SweetGirl! Love Mommy Daddy & your l’il sister Brandi. xoxox Close
To My Mom and Dad / Angel Kayla
MOM and DAD ....I'm Everyplace
Mom & Dad don't mourn for me…I'm still here, though you don't see. I'm right by your side each night and day and within your heart I long to stay. My body is gone but I'm always near; I’m everything you feel, see or hear. My spirit is free, but I'll never depart as long as you keep me alive in your heart. I'll never wander out of you sight; I'm the brightest star on a summer night. I'll never be beyond your reach; I’m the warm moist sand when you're at the beach. I'm the colorful leaves when fall comes around and the pure white snow that blankets the ground. I'm the beautiful flowers of which you're so fond; the clear cool water in a quiet pond. I'm the first bright blossom you'll see in the spring; the first warm raindrop that April will bring. I'm the first ray of light when the sun starts to shine, and you'll see that the face in the moon is mine. When you start thinking there's no one to love you, you can talk to me through the Lord above you. I’ll whisper my answer through the leaves on the trees, and you'll feel my presence in the soft summer breeze. I'm the hot salty tears that flow when you weep and the beautiful dreams that come while you sleep. I'm the smile you see on a baby's face…Just look for me, I'm everyplace! Close
Kayla/ Lani &. Kelly (Aunt & Uncle )
We remember Kayla as a quietly confident, well grounded, beautiful girl. We know that she plays just as important a role where she is now. Bless you Kayla XOXOXOXO Love Kelly, Lani, Jaz & Kassidy Close
Angels/ Angelica Grover (Twinless Twin)
The angels are always near to those who are grieving, to whisper to them that their loved ones are safe in the hand of God. ~Quoted in The Angels' Little Instruction Book by Eileen Elias Freeman, 1994
To my Sweetgirl, Kayla ~ Merry Christmas and Happy New Year / Suzette O'Flynn (Mommy)
Hey my Sweetgirl....well, another year gone by and my heart is kinda resting easy now....it's really hard to celebrate christmas without you; you brought so much magic to the season and it's just not there anymore. I know Brandi tries but she too has a hard time without you. On Christmas eve, it's 1:00 in the morning and I'm trying to get her to bed so Santa can make his presence and she just couldn't go...there she lay on the couch, pretending to sleep; I know she remembers when you were here and telling her, "Come on Brandi, let's go to bed so Santa can come." and away you two would go. I'm sensing you must have whispered it in her ear this Christmas eve nite, cuz it was all of a sudden and she was up and saying good nite. Kay, I know we are supposed to find our 'new' little family life, but losing you is still so new and fresh in our hearts that it is hard....how can we just let go...how can we? To hear a song, see things you would like, walking down that cleaning aisle in the store, seeing your big eyes at the site of christmas abrewing just brings back so many memories and it saddens me that you are not here. Brandi is so lonely that she must be with friends to keep her going but at the same time, she struggles to keep them; I think it is because she is afraid of getting to close and losing somebody she loves again. You would love the person your little sister is becoming although there are still a few wrinkles to iron out; she is a very strong girl, loving, kind, exciting, unpredictable, fun but all this goes with a broken and lonely heart. I love you and miss you Kay...we all do...THE WHOLE WORLD!!! I pray we - mommy, daddy and Brandi~Bear can focus on celebrating more of your memory rather than your loss. Happy New Year Kayla Marie Dawn O'Flynn ~ Our Sweet~Girl xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox
Angels surround us no matter where you go Angels are around us don't you know Angels will be strong for you Angels will belong to you Angels will survive for you and protect you no matter what you do Angels will be there in time of need and angels will never leave as long as you believe.
walking together / Vanessa Foley (My bestfriend )Read >>
walking together / Vanessa Foley (My bestfriend )
-best friends hand and hand-
-walking through life with you-
-was the most wonderful-
-most beautiful thing I could have done-
-now here I am our walk has ended-
-the path has stopped-
-A loved ones touch-
-a kiss and hug-
-never believing that our journey would end-
-we were so close walking for so long-
-your hand and mine latched together so tightly-
-promising to never let go-
-as you saw the end of the road-
-you tried to turn back-
-everyone following you in their hearts-
-the end of the road caught up to you-
-now all we have is our memories-
-our bestfriend is the clouds-
-so I pray to you and say hello-
-I’ll miss you forever-
-and never forget-
-your my bestfriend and I love you.-
Forever In Our Hearts / Misty MacRae (Friend)Read >>
Forever In Our Hearts / Misty MacRae (Friend)
Ill never forget the memories kayla and i made, nor the things i learned from her. she made me realize what some of the most important things in life are, and she showed me that no matter how "bad" things are there is always a reason to hold your head high and smile, she had a wonderful spirit and an even brighter soul, and a smile that could kill
thanx for making an impact on my life kayla always remember and never forget we love and miss you dearly
If I could have a lifetime wish A dream that would come true. I'd pray to God with all my heart for yesterday and you.. A thousand words can't bring you back, I know because I have tried. And neither will a million tears I know because I've cried. You left behind my broken heart and happy memories too. I never wanted memories, I only wanted you.
Dear Kayla Your love will shine forever .when children are called home to God We ask ourselves why with no answers. The pain parents feel is so intense their love for their child is more then amazing .Kayla you have not left ,you are just on a new journey and mom will know your always only a wispher away she will feel you kisses on her soft cheeks as she sleeps and her Dreams will bring you back into her aching arms your smile and love will fill her heart with pride that Kayle why mom has tears in her eyes Close
Thinking of you Susane and your Precious Kayla. / Pam, Jamie Hopey's Mom. (Canadian) (Angle friends. )Read >>
Thinking of you Susane and your Precious Kayla. / Pam, Jamie Hopey's Mom. (Canadian) (Angle friends. )
I just wanted to let you know how sorry I am to read about your Beautiful Kayla. It breaks my heart to read of another child taken so soon from their parents. I know Grief is our constance companion now and its so difficult just to get through a day. But please know your not alone in this great pain. When I lost my oldest son, Jamie this July 08, 2006, my world has stopped. And you wonder how life can just go on when our world is crashing on around us.
I have also asked the same questions everyday,as you have. But so far what I can also see is that even though we are filled with so much sorrow and grief, we can still reach out to others and we can get comfort, from people we don't even know, b/c all these Angel Mom's can relate to our pain and suffering. So please if you need to talk about this please reach out to us, b/c there really is some good left in this ugly old cruel world.
The things that have kept me going thus far, is upmost knowing my Jamie lives on the otherside and he can hear me and see me. I have felt his presence and please just talk with Kaly as her Dad does and you will feel her presence. I know it's hard to image that their is a God, but know he is there and still loves us even though we don't feel like it. The only thing that got me through Xmas was knowing we celebrate Jesus's Birthday, and I heard it said over and over again, " Jesus was Born, so others could live On". We Have eternal life. So just hopes this may bring you a little comfort. Love like this never goes away, its here to stay!! I also have a younger son, that makes me get out of bed each day and cope the best I can. But also the Love of family,friends and Angle Mom's give me courage and strength somedays.
I only hope this may bring you a little bit of comfort and please know your not alone with your feelings, grief and sorrow. I also hope you may find a little bit of peace & comfort in 2007. I have enclosed some flowers for you hope it may bring a little comfort. Hugs from Pam, Jamie Hopey's Mom. http://jamie-hopey.memory-of.com/
Happy New Year Sweetgirl... / Suzette O'Flynn (Mommy)Read >>
Happy New Year Sweetgirl... / Suzette O'Flynn (Mommy)
Good morning Sunshine....it's 2007...Happy New Year!! Mommy loves you...mommy misses you so much. Another year starting without you....where are you Kay??? I know your lil sister Brandi is here and that I have to concentrate solely on her now...BUT it's just not complete without you...our family will never be the same ever again...I don't think this pain will ever go away....I don't know a pain that is worse...it's not like a wound that heals...it's an open sore that continuously weeps. Why....oh why did this have to happen Kay? Why does this have to happen to any parent....what is the purpose? what are we really learning from it? I can't see it, I can't understand it!!! It's so unfair...
I'm supposed to believe that you are in no pain and in a better place...my mind just doesn't seem to grasp that yet...how can that be when you were in a great place with us and how can there be no pain....I feel tremendous pain without you and I'm sure you feel it too not being able to be here; daddy says that you two have discussions...my mind can't grasp that either...how can he...your not here...Where are you Kay???
I love you whole world..........whole universe and back!!!